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April 22 2017

02:11
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02:10
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April 21 2017

02:08
02:05

smug-ruby:

skarchomp:

Some nerd who doesn’t know how Pokemon works: Status moves don’t matter lol they all suck

Me: Explain this then

i googled what move this was bc i never saw it before and 

???this is the nicest move in all of the games it doesnt even have an effect or does any damage it just lets u and an ally pkmn dance together

02:05
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02:03
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April 19 2017

19:19
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19:19

The Pit

yourplayersaidwhat:

The group successfully found a pit trap before anyone could get hurt. The dm gave us the dimensions saying it was six feet wide and ten feet deep.
BARD (ooc): hey my character is over six feet tall I lay myself across the pit.
ROGUE (ooc): does the pit take up the whole trail?
DM: no.
ROGUE: my character walks around.
Rest of party does the same.
BARD: dammit why didn’t I think of that.

17:10
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equestrianrepublican:

ourholyvengeance:

equestrianrepublican:

ourholyvengeance:

equestrianrepublican:

discourse-senpai:

equestrianrepublican:

ourholyvengeance:

derped2:

justnoodlefishthings:

These are Garter Snakes and completely harmless little noodles I could literally sit right in the middle and they wouldn’t care

Friendly noodles are best noodles.

@klubbhead

@equestrianrepublican

@right-over-wrong

@discourse-senpai

Now replace that with worms.

FOR 175 MILLION I’D LAY DOWN IN THERE AND PET THE SNAKES. WORMS ARE EVEN BETTER AS THEY DON’T BITE.

okay even if it was worms I love money more than you could ever possibly understand. I would stay there for two weeks if it meant the money would multiply every day

I’d become one with the worms/snakes…

Ok, this is getting weird now.

You know how much I could do… With 175 million dollars…. Tax free?

A lifetime of drinking and hookers?

I don’t drink and I’m not going to jail for fucking a hooker.

I’d be able to go to college and do something with my life. And fund my crippling addiction to video game micro-transactions.

Yeah I’d do it

April 18 2017

20:44
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browsedankmemes:

USA_irl

20:43
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20:43
20:37

durbikins:

It’s not so surprising how YouTube Poop became a thing when you remember that there was a generation of kids where a majority of movies they watched while growing up had entire scenes dedicated to “Who Let The Dogs Out?”

20:33
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approach:

“There’s about 5 other dudes she calls daddy so we gotta make a couple of stops”

20:28
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aquaman-shoes:

One of my all-time favorite twitter threads

20:27
20:27

thinking2:

electoralcollege:

Halfway through my Presidential term I abruptly resign to become a Minecraft youtuber

thats what nixon did

20:27

maunderfiend:

meinewortesindwundershon:

maunderfiend:

Can I offer you a bird in these trying times

what a beautiful mourning dove 😍 is it your pet? does it have a mate???

i went outside and picked it up off a branch

20:26
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